How I overcame my Fear of Public Speaking? 101 Lessons I learnt from the School of Hard knocks, Numerous Trials and Errors

Public Speaking is about your Audience

Hey Chris!, You must be born a great speaker. You just speak your mind, Gosh! How do you do that? I have heard many comments and candid confessions from near and dear ones.

But as most of them know, It was not easy for me. In my College days, I was good Catholic boy (Now I am good catholic man with a small 'c')

I was a volunteer  at the local prayer group. We use to participate in cultural activities and interact with families.

When our prayer group shifted to another part of the city, our Prayer leader decided to connect with local schools and the local church community.

We gave presentations and I would just volunteer (mostly ushering people and smiling when needed). One day my Prayer Leader asked me to give a 45 minutes talk on the importance of the Holy Rosary.

I started collecting all the books available on Public Speaking. I was not prepared for it.

So I started reading up books on Public Speaking and books on the Rosary. I thought that I would be able to speak when the time was right.

I practiced in front of the mirror and I thought I was going to be okay. When the day had arrived I just couldn't open my mouth.

I picked up some courage and I spoke. I spoke all the information I knew and guess what I managed to speak for only 10 minutes.

What was going to happen for the next 35 minutes? What was I going to say? I just excused myself and moved away.

At that moment I thought 'flight' was a better response than other alternatives. I thought it didn't make sense to deal with a situation I never knew how to manage.

A decade later I was ready to lecture and speak with confidence. I was able to share my ideas and opinions.

Public Speaking can be difficult for the unprepared

This confidence and transition was not some kind of miracle. It was the result of an effort.

An Effort to achieve a Goal to change. Did I attend a course or read a book?

I did both and they helped me tremendously. But it was also the constant push and desire to make something happen.

A lot of times we think that things will miraculously change if you read a book or join a course?

Things will change, but it might only mean having more information about the strategies and techniques.

By themselves Strategies and techniques are not enough. One needs to also practice and be open to making mistakes.

One thing I learnt from the Bad Experiences I had with Public Speaking. They teach you a lot about yourself and people.

After the bad experience I had as a young College Student. I remember friends and people coming up to me and encouraging me.

Thinking about it I realized that your audience wants you to do a good job and are most willing to support you. Though sometimes it may not seem like that.

There are different kinds of people and we need to accept that reality. 

So Here are some Pointers I think beginners need to know about Public Speaking that I learnt.

#Number 1: Respect your audience

I remember people telling me to treat your Audience is like Pumpkins. Besides being a  horribly bad advice I think it is not true.

The audience might have people who are masters on the topic you are covering. When you respect your audience you mentally treat them as partners or participants rather than just a spectator.

Your Audience is giving you their attention; ask a marketer or salesman and they will tell you the value of attention.

It is a wonderful opportunity to share what you know and learn. When we share we explore ideas as a community.

I believe Public Speaking is a two way street. The Speaker uses primarily words to communicate and the audience uses body language, reactions etc.

#Number 2: Prepare well

It is an amazing experience Researching, it is like an adventure.

We live in an information age. There is an abundance of good information.

Preparing well would mean to me; Researching well.

Sifting through information you judge relevant to your audience or Topic at hand.

It is an amazing experience Researching, it is like an adventure.

One question opens up like a proverbial can of worms. You begin to see how an idea can be applied or is applied in various contexts and situations.

So Preparing well will also include writing your ideas and presenting them in a way that is coherent.

You can share a handout or some notes from what you have spoken to your audience in a digital format.

We live in a digital age, connecting and sharing good content is highly valuable.

#Number 3: Believe in yourself

Leaders are made

This is a line that is overused. I think but we all (at times) don't grasp the meaning of it in our hearts or we just take ourselves for granted.

We have tremendous potential to create something amazing. Look around and see all the great services and products you use.

They have been made possible by someone who believes in their own abilities to share something valuable to the world.

When you are engaging in Public Speaking you are sharing a part of you with others.

#Number 4: Practice well

Your audience wants you to succeed

You don't need to just practice in front of a mirror. I will throw a wild guess here, You have at least more than 10 friends on Facebook.

Request them to be your audience and review your talk. You could use those pointers in your presentation.

Go on Twitter and share your ideas. This will help you prepare better material.

There is no Rules here, You can be creative here. Practicing means more than memorizing lines.

It also can mean delivering better content.

#Number 5: Research on the topic

Public Speaking can be more than sharing information

You consider this as a Point connected to Preparing well.

But I include it as a separate pointer to emphasize this important aspect of Research.

It focuses on dealing with a problem or issues.

You must decide clearly what you want to share with the audience. Do you want your Presentation to be informative, entertaining or anything else?

This will set the tone for the way you collect material and deliver it.

#Number 6: Speak on what interests your Audience

Chris, How would you know that? If you have prepared well ask them directly. Then craft your presentation to what you and your audience have decided.

You can also interview the organizer or speak to some members of the audience before you  deliver your presentation.

You could also check online forums and groups for the topics that interests people.
You will get a lot of insights into topics that interests people.

Google search, Quora, Reddit or even Facebook groups are a great place to get great insights.

What is stopping you from getting insights about your audience? If you are wrong about it. 

Not an issue, as you have list of topics you can focus on (for your presentation).

#Number 7: It is not about you

The purpose is to express

I remember learning this from an Urdu Theater Guru, Iqbal Niyazi. He always says that Theater ( you could add Blogging, Public Speaking etc. here) is about expressing and not impressing.

We sometimes make it about numbers and impressing people. I think even if there is just one person who gives their time and attention, You are obliged to give your best.

Numbers are important and not important too. There is no wasted effort, It is only our Perception that makes use feel that way.

In Conclusion

We engage in Public Speaking everyday. We just don't realize it. In our offices when we speak to our teams, in Parties and other social situations.

We think that Public Speaking is limited to the Podium or Stage. In a way it is and it is not, What matters here is what you want to share.

I hope this post finds you good health and do share your thoughts on our FB Page.

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